Chance Choice...

A friend once told me "it's not what we are that defines us, but rather what we do to be what we are that defines us as a person". Believe it or not, we live in a world that's selfish, cold and cruel.

I was known as Officer Jansen of the Mississippi Police force. This story is a story of love, of selflessness and of sacrifice.

I was given a call one day at the office on the 17th of March 1993; the call came in from the local hospital. The nurse on the line told me that my then girlfriend had fainted in our apartment and had hit her head on the kitchen stove.

I hung up the phone and rushed straight to the hospital to inspect the extent of my girl's injuries. To my despair, the doctors told me that she had suffered severe blood loss due to the prolonged opening of her wound and that she would be in a coma for some time.

That night, when I returned home, I felt that emptiness that usually came with an empty heart...longing for a love that would never return. For those of you who do not know, my girl and I were dating in secret for the past seven years of our life. Her parents didn't want her to marry a guy whom she would have to stay up at night worrying whether or not he will return...or whether or not he will celebrate their child's birthday together.

In the end, the both of us eloped to Mississippi where we lived a happy life for almost four years now. It was just me, her, our kid - Aston, and our pet dog "Beagle". Although it wasn't a mansion that we lived in, we were contented with living in a little cottage by the sea.

A few weeks after my wife was checked into the hospital, the doctors there detected some anomalies in her blood and concurred that she had a problem in her liver...which meant that she needed a liver transplant.

Naturally, when she married me, it was against her parents' wishes and therefore, getting either of them to donate an organ for their outcast daughter was out of the question. So, I volunteered myself to be tested as a perspective organ donor.

The good news was, my liver was compatible with my wife's and that meant that I could let her live. But the bad news was - it would be at the cost of my life.

After all, we had promised each other..."to cherish and to hold, to love and honour, in sickness and in health, from this day on, till death do us part". What kind of man would I be if I just left her here to battle this by herself without helping her out.

It was on the morning of the 21st of June 1993 that I pulled my rookie along with me to the hospital to visit my wife. When we got there, I pulled my gun on one of my wife's attending doctor and fired a round into the air. This time I warned my rookie that I would kill the doctor if he didn't stop me.

Being the rookie he was, he actually ended up calling for SWAT backup just to disarm me. When the big guns arrived, I fired a shot into the air and gave them the same warning, all the while using the doctor as my shield.

After a thirty minute standoff, I decided to put an end to it. I whispered into the doctor's ear - "remember, use my liver for Elanore...and never tell her or my son what happened to me". After saying those words, I threw the doctor aside and rushed towards the sea of rifles aimed at me with my gun still in hand.

It didn't take long for the SWAT team to recognise that the doctor was out of harm's way and opened fire on me.

After all the smoke died down, I was looking down at my own body and I saw the doctor rushing towards me while two SWAT officers trying to restrain him.

In the end, my liver was transplanted to my wife and she now lives a fulfilling life with our son Aston.

Valentine...

Snow falls on the boulevard,

Saying goodbyes and handshakes.

Shouldn't be this hard,

Just one tear is all it takes.

There she goes,

On a journey to a new land.

Our love may be the only thing she knows,

To not be lost in its vast ocean of sand.

Whether it be in the west,

Or she go to the east.

The distance apart will be our test,

We shall overcome it and we shall feast.

Though great, the distance apart, our love shan't wane.

In the end, only our love shall shine divine.

Will you walk with me down this lonely lane,

Will you be my valentine...

Stardust

Twinkle, twinkle oh so bright.

Be mine star, be mine tonight.

Leave thine worries far from sight,

Come with me and everything will be alright.

Sitting here by the beach, thinking.

Feeling sorrow, remorse burden my heart.

Remembering your words, still sinking,

Pulling us ever further apart.

Remembering all we used to be,

Now, it's only me.

Wishing that someday, you'd see,

How much I long for thee.

Dark clouds gather above.

Heaven cries in pain.

For us and for our love.

For our efforts that were in vain.

What happens next, nobody knows,

It'll be a lesson learnt.

Whichever way the river now flows,

It'll keep me from being burnt.

Who She Will Be...

As he looks into the mirror someday,

He sees his past and remnants of sorrow; dismay.

Written on his face, clear as day,

Apprehension and words that no soul will say.

As he dons his tuxedo and grooms his hair,

He is reminded of how he always had her to do so.

But that was when she was still there.

Now, years passed since, but he still feels the blow.

He's fallen twice before.

He loves them still,

But they wanted him no more.

And left him without any will...

A guitar key chain clings tightly to his cellphone.

The last gift from his past lyrical lover.

A tiny fragment of his heart left beating still.

After they both told him "it's over".

He's still afraid to love,

Not willing to be hurt anymore.

But now he's to marry a dove.

And only she knows what's in store.

As the church bells ring,

And the choir begins to sing.

He hears an angel's warning,

And he sees the devil calling.

To cherish and to hold,

To protect and to love.

She would be the third girl he told,

That he would love from Sea to heaven above.

There she stands at the altar,

With face veiled and hands shaking nervously.

Surely neither will falter.

But neither him nor I am sure of who 'she' will be...

The Letter...

Pardon me, I'm lost and need a listener.

Someone who can listen to me without judging.

You see, I have to send my girl this letter.

But, I don't know if I still got her loving.

I've let her down, I fear.

She's always loved me and held me dear.

Yet, I couldn't do anything to stop her leavin',

Leaving me with a heart a-breakin'.

For a while, I couldn't breathe.

It was like my world came crashing down.

I was numbed by pain and writhe,

No sound came, and I wore a frown.

I should have stopped her from leaving.

I should have treated her better before she left.

I was blind, not knowing she was suffering.

Perhaps she's better off now, without worry of death.

I wonder how she is now, if she's alright.

I'd tell her I'm fine.

If only I could see her tonight,

I'd hug her tight, kiss her and make her mine.

Though I try to move on, with another.

Somehow, the emptiness remains.

The closeness we had once, now grown further.

And now I'm left with this pain and tear stains.

She looks rather like her, the eyes especially.

She has her laugh, her smile, her scent.

I try to move on, but I don't know if I'll be hers entirely.

Tell me what Love is, should it hurt to this extent?

I've been so lonely for so long, and now she's in my life.

To mend my broken heart and accompany me.

Though I know not of the future or if she will be my wife,

I can only hope that forever in love we will be.

I feel so guilty trying to forget her.

Sigh, I don't know what to do.

Yet, I can't live without the other.

I am kept awake by rue.

You see, I've written a letter for my girl.

To ask for her to forgive me, in case she hasn't.

To tell her I love another girl.

But I can't seem to find the postbox to heaven.

Farewell...

Grey streaked skies;

Sadness lined with pain.

Hidden by masks and lies,

Covering up every tear stain.

Handshakes all 'round,

Tears flowed freely towards ground.

As we hugged each other farewell without a sound,

And hoped each had a brighter future to be found.

She seemed happy today...

I'm glad to see she's moved on.

Perhaps a very long time from now, I'll say.

That my pain has fully gone.

But for now, I'll have to carry this broken heart.

With nowhere to seek asylum,

I don't know where to start.

To heal my pain from becoming numb...

I hope she finds happiness, wherever she may be.

I hope he treats her right.

I hope she doesn't remember me,

All the times we had and I hope he keeps her warm at night.

I'm sorry that I couldn't do more.

I'm sorry you had to suffer when you were with me.

I'm sorry, all I can do now is adore,

You from across this painful sea.

Perhaps I'll learn to forget you in time.

But my heart will never feel the same,

For anyone else, because you have tamed me.

And you alone are worth more to me than fame.

Farewell, my Valentine.

I've resorted to this wandering life of mine,

For I can't forget you and how you looked divine.

He is lucky to have you, a wife so fine.

Rain accompanies me,

As I cry for a love lost.

A strike of lightning may set me free,

Because death is the only price for love and I'll bear that cost...

...

The Script has got a few songs that really fit my mood lately...coincidence?